The brilliant British musician, Daniel Cavanagh (formerly of Anathema, currently of Weather Systems) put the title poem “Word Thief” into music. I don’t know about you, but I really love it. I am grateful for the collaboration and for this beautiful outcome. Daniel wrote the music and narrated the poem I wrote. ❤️💜❤️💜
I love the outcome, the finished song, and I loved working on this project together. It was a new and quite enriching experience for me.
The melody and narration highlights the words and don’t take their shine. The poem is always at the front of the “song”. That it’s not me who narrates the poem makes it more precious and special – my English is good, but I am not a native speaker and that’s audible.
Again, I think this project was a lot of fun, and it opened my eyes a bit to the quality of my own poetry (simply by hearing it read out loud by someone else).
I am grateful for the opportunities given to me and for this beautiful song.
Thank you for listening to the audio above. It matters. A lot. And thank you to the handful of people who ordered their copy of WORD THIEF.
Born in the UK to a Dutch family, Josh moved to Germany, Luxembourg before settling in the Netherlands. But because of his small ties to Luxembourgish, he receives a lot of airplay over here and is considered a local artist. The above single is from his upcoming debut album.
Soen is a Swedish band who recently (November 18th 2022) released a very intimate live album. On this album, you can hear songs from their previous masterpieces. I admit, live albums are always a bit hit or miss. But this one is very good. You almost can’t hear that it is live. And the song we know and love being arranged with strings – it’s magic in a way. So… Listen and enjoy the above song.
Yesterday was Robert’s birthday. Robert passed away in 2020. (He had cancer). I loved that man a lot. I called him my mentor; he was the one who believed in my writing when I didn’t and he was also the man who encouraged me to publish my own books. He was a great man and when I think of him, it is always with a fond smile. But I miss him. I miss him a lot. Everyday, not only yesterday or today… He is always on my mind.
On November 12th, it was the anniversary of my grandma’s passing. She passed away in 2016. My grandma… She caused so much hurt and was so cruel to me, and yet… I quite miss her. I would love for her to see me now and to see how I succeeded in life, even though she always told me that I was a failure and a waste of skin.
Yesterday, I went to a restaurant. We noticed a waiter being more hyper than he usually is but thought nothing of it. At the end of our meal, we ordered the check and he came to our table. We laughed, he complimented me on my yellow Casio watch and then he offered to have a digestive together. He brought three limoncello and before we drank, he told me/us that he was scared because he would learn today if his cancer is back or not. He told me that he had had cancer of the colon when he was 22 and now, six years later, there might be something in his pancreas. He then went on to remind us/me that we should tell our loved ones that we love them and care about them, and that we should be more forgiving of small mistakes and quirks that drive us mad. We drank, we hugged, paid (intending to add a good tip, but he refused to take it), and then we left. He is on my mind a lot today. He was a stranger until last night, but today I care about him and want him to be okay. Truly.
I miss my friend.
Mark Kozelek & Jimmy LaValle – the wonder of life prevails (from the album Perils from the Sea, 2013)
Megadeath – a tout le monde. From the album Youthanasia (1994). The song was quite controversial when it was released as some of the lyrics sound like a suicide note.
A tout le monde A tout mes amis Je vous aime Je dois partir These are the last words I’ll ever speak And they’ll set me free
Temple of the Dog was band with members of different groups. Today, it is regarded as a supergroup with members of Soundgarden and Pearl Jam.
The self-titled album was recorded in late 1990 and released in April 1991. I stress this, because Pearl Jam and Eddie Vedder only released their first album in August 1991 and had their real breakthrough in 1992 when “Jeremy” was published.
The above song was shared with me this afternoon… Eddie Vedder and Chris Cornell 😍🥰
Tonight Depeche Mode released a statement saying that their founding member and keyboarder Andy “Fletch” Fletcher passed away. He was 60 years old. It’s a sad moment for sure.
I wish his family a lot of love and privacy to mourn in peace.
Do you know that feeling of being without words? A head full of thoughts that are unable to be voiced? As if the words are stuck in your throat and the moment you want to say them, they make no sound?
I experience this once in a while. It started yesterday and it is still there today. I cannot speak. And I also physically feel this, my tongue is stuck against the palate, my jaw is tense – as a result, my neck is tense too, which in turn affects my shoulder.
(I am known to remind people to breathe and to unclench their jaw or teeth when they are anxious – try it. It works. Most of the time.)
This state makes me seem passive-aggressive. I am not; I am just without words, and the ones I am capable of using are often short and that’s interpreted as being rude. But because this is real life, I don’t have the words to explain that I can’t speak – it’s a circle, really.
It’s a sure way of pushing people away, of making them run.
So, instead of replying to messages, I leave them on read and kind of ghost the people until I feel better. Only very few receive an instant reply when they message me anyway – but in a state like this, only the three or four very special ones of those few get my attention. Even at the risk of being perceived as rude or passive-aggressive.
I am weirder than you. Sticky emotional neediness.
Words are weapons or blankets. They can hurt or comfort.
People are very weird, even more so on the internet.
Just a couple of days ago, a band I used to follow on every platform, a band that disbanded in 2020, posted a statement that one of their members made a suicide attempt. The statement shared all kinds of very personal information about mental illnesses and it also addresses rumours that have been floating around for years, about said musician.
I am, of course, talking about Anathema and Daniel Cavanagh.
I was indeed shocked to read the statement, because I was heavily influenced by this band during my formative years. Even now, when I need something comforting, I go back to this band’s music, and I am looking forward to the new project that has been announced a while ago – Weather Systems. Now, I am not a die-hard fan, I am not one who reads rumours or reads comments on posts, but this time, I did. And I shouldn’t have.
Instead of showing compassion though, there are comments (on Instagram) wondering if the statement is even true or if it is a way of extorting more money from fans – Mr Cavanagh, through a fan of the band, was/is asking fans to donate money to a Go Fund Me campaign to be able to record a new album of his new project – Weather Systems.
Where is all this hate coming from? And why is it directed towards a literal stranger? A man who is on his knees as it is.
There are also the comments telling that they love him and how much he influenced them. Nice ones. But they don’t stick out as much.
I wonder… If I were a musician who was suffering through all this, and decided that it is time to step forward, to strip my soul bare; if I read those comments, the nice ones would certainly give me a lift, but the negative ones, I think they would send me down a downward spiral.
What is happening in this world that people can’t show a little respect, compassion, and empathy towards a man who felt so wrong on this earth that he wanted to erase his existence?
I cannot understand this. Not one bit. It makes me lose faith in humanity.
Be kind. Be gentle. And don’t judge without knowing the facts. Everyone is fighting a battle, even if we can’t see it.
To Dan, I wish lots of strength, love, and patience. The world is a better place with you in it. 💜✨💜
reflections of an unquiet mind 