The blink of an eye (2019)

Awoken by the sound of an eyelash shed from its safe home;
Floating to the pillow that which is loaded with secret dreams and memories
A puff of sleepy breath prolongs its descend into oblivion,
Hiding it from the world; making it disappear – as if it didn’t mean anything at all.

❤️💜❤️💜

I saw that this one had a view today and wanted to share it again as I quite like the imagery

Doubts

Will I fit in?

Will they accept/like me?

Will I know what to do?

What if it doesn’t work out?

Does one know right away?

Am I wearing the right clothes?

What if my jeans rip? (The cloth is dangerously worn)

Will I be able to tame my hair?

What if I forget something?

What if my overthinking makes a positive situation negative?

Why is a new start (again) so frightening?

Why do I keep thinking that this needs to work out or I will be a failure?

Why do I pressure myself this much?

How will I spend the next hours?

Was this easier when I was younger?

Where is that comforting hug?

Is it always like this?

If I remember to breathe and to be me, will I be okay?

Why am I so scared?

###

New job starts today

the moon’s lullaby

I miss the full moon's lullaby
and the gentle sway of a summer night's breeze
I want to dance in the dark
and sing my songs to the gleaming stars
But I fall into dreams
before I push the clouds away to see the clear sky
I fall asleep before I hear
the night's whispered secrets in my ear.

Today’s post

In May, I wanted to post every day and share a bit of everything – poetry, music, me…, mostly positive stuff.

Well today’s post is not a very happy one. During the last days, I was very energized and did lots of stuff around the house and cleaned corners I haven’t cleaned in ages. It felt and feels good. Looks good too.

But this morning things changed.

I have a cast iron pot for stews and pasta sauce. My son had a friend over for lunch and I made Bolognese/ spaghetti al ragù. I took the pot off the shelf and felt a sharp pain in my right arm. I did not let it stop me. I did my thing. But after lunch the pain got too much to bare and I saw a doctor.

In short: My arm is fucked again. Can’t say it any other way. I need to rest now and not move it too much and not do any lifting either. And it sucks so much. I am in pain like I haven’t been in months. I mean, my arm was never healed and always in pain, but this is horrible. It drives tears to my eyes and makes me reach for the strong meds (which my doctor also advised).

The spaghetti were great, by the way.

Next Monday, my new job begins and I need to be fit. I am worried now.

###

Next post will be a happier one again, I promise. But now I had to vent a bit. This arm disaster just doesn’t end.

Throwback writing

I used to write a lot on a site called Wattpad. It got a lot less, but I am still a member of that site.

Weird, isn’t it.

Wattpad

The above is a link that will lead you to a book filled with thoughts and musings and poems. As always, the line between fact and fiction is a thin one, but it is there…

Take a look, if you will. You’ll notice that there is not much interaction, not many votes or comments, but that’s okay… I am not an influencer and I am not a best-selling writer, I am just me.

xx

new emotion

I have this very rare and almost foreign emotion:

Peace.

I am content. There is so much uncertainty in my life coming up in the next weeks. I should be scared shitless, but weirdly enough, I am not.

I know how to love and I know how to be loved in return. And right now (this moment) I am enough.

Tomorrow is a new day and maybe after I slept, that feeling vanishes like the moon vanishes at dawn. But for now, I embrace it.

Inner Peace.

Nice.

untitled_20220511 (suggestions welcome)


We ran from each other until there was nowhere else to run.
We hid from each other until every cover was exhausted.
We fell deeply in lust until emotions took over.
We tried to be apart too many times but we always ceased to function properly.

Because without your presence, something is missing in my soul.
And without my presence, something is missing in your soul.

We ran in different directions until we stood toe to toe.
One look, one shared breath, and an explosion of emotions engulfed us in our own infinite love story.
Our abject loneliness vanished for we complete each other's lost souls.

We found ourselves in the essence of the other.