Patrick (my husband of 16years and partner for 23) and I have been browsing through old photos, to catalogue them and to delete the ones who have double or triple even. He wrote a script that loads our photos up to a server and that also has face recognition. Face recognition for the kids is a bit more complicated because they change so much and sometimes we have to file pictures manually.
During our sessions, we also came across videos of the kids. Mostly when they were younger.
I was and still am a bit of a weird mom and it is documented on film. I was playing with them more wildly, throwing them in the air and turning around with them until they couldn’t stand anymore. But I also watched many picture books with them. I can also be seen cooking and consoling, painting and putting plasters on. We laugh a lot and sometimes we also cry together.
I am very much in love with my kids. I look at them and keep saying how beautiful they were and how intelligent or headstrong or special.
Olivier, Giulia, and Amalia are the rays of light in the dark.
Tonight, Giulia sat with me for an hour and told me stories about school and her life. Yesterday, Ollie did the same when I went to pick him up from the bus station. And Amalia – she is the youngest (13years old) got used to coming home after school and laying her head in my lap while I am reading or watching TV. I rake my fingers through her hair and enjoy the quiet but intimate moments.
I know, every parent says this, but my kids are the best. And the most beautiful too.
I am sooooo proud of them. They don’t need to do much, it’s simply in the way they are.
I mean, Giulia filled out an organ donor cars tonight. She is almost 15 (in 7 days she is) and she already thinks about that stuff?! I know, I did too, but it’s not normal. She is awesome.
The three of them are.
Love love love
EDIT: written November 14th
reflections of an unquiet mind 