A little update

https://twitter.com/micqu1/status/1637886253096902659?t=ajj8Jq29LGISC5vNFBrHkQ&s=09

An update in tweetform that quite pulled the rug from underneath my feet. I knew for a while that working with babies and toddlers is complicated and it was my choice to protect my body with a job away from what I really always wanted. But now, it is there on black and white. Big letters. I cannot do the job I always wanted to do. I had no plan B the when I was younger… Working at a nursery was my dream job. Yes, I had to leave because of health issues, but there was a possibility to go back…now that possibility is gone. And you know?! I blame the surgeon. Yes, there, I said it. My biggest issue now is the tendon and ligaments associated with my biceps in my shoulder. The surgery I had was supposed to fix my shoulder, there was no prior talk of anything being wrong with my muscle. But the surgeon saw something and in good conscience, he tried to heal it. But he made everything worse. The shoulder is good, but my damn arm… Two years and I am still in pain. Now, today, I am angry too. Disillusioned. Disappointed.

Talk about a life-changing day… Fucking hell… It hurts more than I want to admit. And it hurts more than I will allow myself to show… How does one recover from that?