Last year, I published two books and my initial plan was to publish a new one this February. I think I mentioned it several times before. But somehow, these last months were not very productive and I decided to drop the project. It took a while to come to terms with it, but eventually, I also mentioned it in passing here on this very blog.
But as so often, once I voice something, it is like pieces of a puzzle fall into place and I am drawn back to the plan I abandoned in the first place.
I shared many a poem here on the blog, but as you can see on the photo above, I also keep journals and use whatever comes in handy when inspiration hits.
Right now, I am looking at short of 200 pages of poetry. I will have to cut a lot of material and change some. Also, there is some writing that is horrible and others that is just plain depressing. Seeing that most of these poems were written last year, one might believe that I had a very bad year in 2021.
And so I spent the best part of this Sunday afternoon trying to remember last year. And not much stood out.
- Shoulder pain
- Extensive sick leave at work
- More pain
- New job
- Troubles with the twin flame
- New friendship
- Some writing
- Lots of music
- Persisting shoulder pain
- Family matters
All quite mundane. Add my kids and husband to the mix – yes I am married and tomorrow is actually our 22nd anniversary. (Obviously not wedding anniversary – that’s 14 years).
I did have emotional ups and downs and some empty moments too. But I cannot remember having been as miserable as some of those poems read.
A predominant theme seems to be being rootless, finding freedom, building a home, love, and loss.
It will be a while until I sort through all of this. There is no cover picture and no title yet. I will not meet my intended deadline of a February 8th release either. My 39th birthday, by the way. (I think I also mentioned February 18th as a possible release day… I am not sure.)
Anyway… I have been working on this, also trying to decipher my handwriting on occasion, today.
Soon, I will take my aching arm and shoulder to bed. Ah, see… And here I revealed a couple of things about myself in this post, amongst them that 11 months after surgery, I am not pain-free, in fact, the pain got worse again. Ah well…