my sun

If I could live without you and go where my mind wants to send me, darkness would be my comforting blanket. But I cannot breathe without you, and my heart keeps racing into your arms, where I find a love so strong that everything feels like a new sunrise. 
Sunrise as seen from our old home (Sept. 22nd, 2017)


Face it; this is who we are
Standing on the ledge
Threatening to fall
Into each other’s hearts.

One step and we will fly
Through the clouds
Spread wings
Catching us in the wind.

I will not leave you there
Hiding in the dark
Ashamed of who you are
I see you, honest and bare.

Don’t leave me here
I can’t do this on my own
All I want is to hold you
And to kiss away those tears.

How did I get there?

I drove into the unknown
Hiding under rainbow bridges
If I had known my destination
I would have… No! Never mind.
The wind kissing my feathers
Sent me farther and farther 
Away from myself.
The moon was burning 
And the sun felt cold
But I kept swimming on clouds.
Shadows hugged me like a blanket
And the rain caressed my naked skin
I should have given up, but I couldn’t.
In a river of silent gold, 
my stone heart melted.
The reflection changed
yet stayed the same.
A whirlwind of thoughts tried to trick me
Into running and hiding away
But I had arrived and reached the end
I was there; there where I belonged.
I breathed the free air and
listened to the thunderstorm.
In my own arms, I had found it;
The one thing that kept
slipping through my fingers
I found my mind’s elusive peace there.

All around me

All around me are hands
Grabbing hands
Taking what I have to offer
Taking more.

All around me are voices
Nagging voices
Making me believe untruths
Making me believe

All around me are souls
Lost souls
Trying to find their way home
Trying to find

All around me are liars
Fucking liars
Burning with their words
Burning the city

All around me are versions of myself
Versions of who I could be
Too self-conscious to be who I am
Too self-conscious
To live

All around me are reasons to stay alive
Reasons to exist
Making me resist those crippling thoughts
Making me persist.

All around me…
… But I should find everything inside my self.

Unquiet Minds –