Every person has a story. Every person is unique. I truly believe this. And even people who think they are boring and mundane really aren’t. They are interesting in their own right.
My story would make a great drama film or a book. But I cannot write it. I can’t put my story into words. Maybe I am just too scared to live through it all again.
I have many bad mental health days. The older I get, the more I think about the things that went wrong in my childhood and adolescence. Being a parent myself adds to it too.
But I also have many good days. During those days, I tend to say things like: everything happens for a reason. I am exactly where I am supposed to be. If only one thing had been different in my past, my present and future would be different. No regrets; they make us miserable. Every choice I made was the right one when I made it. And also: amor fati – love your fate.
I like being a positive person, even though I am a lot more forgiving to other people. I am quite harsh and strict with myself. I want to love my fate. But is there a way to do that without believing in a God? I am a spiritual person. I believe in the power of nature and of our minds. But is that enough? For me, it is. We cannot control our fate. It’s something that is not easy for me to admit. I feel safest when I can control things, when I can decide what to do. At the same time, my mind is only truly blank when others make decisions for me. Is there a way to embrace fate?
I am wearing a bracelet that is supposed to remind me to love my fate.
A long time ago, I had this made for me. (3 or 4 years ago, I think) It was/is a unique piece. So unimpressive and straightforward, and yet… It is more than we see at first glance. I own two more bracelets that are the same design. One says: they see you! and the other says: are you there? They help me to stay aware and mindful.
The braclets were made on a website: https://myintent.org/ I really quite like the idea.
If I could share my story, I would. As it is, you only ever receive tiny bits and pieces. It does not tell you who I really am.
Thank you for seeing the pieces I leave here for you.